The Janitorial Squad
by Frangelico
Summary: AU. Sesshomaru liked his life the way it was, thank you very much. But when a little girl and a group of custodians barge clear through his happy bubble, he is forced to reevalute justifications. Rated T for Inuyasha's mouth and Miroku's bad pick up lines
1. A Day In His Life

**Edit: **Just fixing some things that were bothering me… not really an update. Sorry

**Disclaimer**: This is the place where the author is supposed to say something witty about how they don't own Inuyasha. Unfortunately for me, my wit has been officially eaten by rabid turtles, and is thus unavailable at the moment.

**Author's Note**: I know no one actually looks at these, but just for the sake of me feeling special, oh WELL. I just want to give a little credit to my friend: wtrdlphn21 for inadvertently encouraging me to get off my unconfident ass and write stuff. And also to my other friend, who isn't a fellow fanfic writer, but my bestest friend for putting up with all my artistic angst. Thumbs up to you, dear Pepo.

And in regards to the fic, a warning: this is _different_. As in this isn't one of those where the author expresses which character should get together with which character. I'm not really sure what kind of fic this is. It should probably go under the "Absolute Crap" genre, but I don't think has one of those.

Oh, and since I didn't mention it in the summary, the pairings are: Sesshomaru/Himself, Inuyasha/Kagome/Kikyo (Because he's a two-timing jerk) and Miroku/EveryWomanWithinTenMilesIncludingSango

Ok, I think I'm done now. Enjoy ::sweatdrop::

* * *

When Myoga decided that he wanted to use Sesshomaru-sama for the commercial, his production assistant had warned him there would be problems. However, Myoga had assumed that, in the long run, Sesshomaru's esteemed prestige would grant the commercial's success and outweigh any troublesome technicalities.

But it seemed that this flea had underestimated the extent of these "technicalities."

"Goddamn it, smile! You're selling grape juice, for God's sake, not corrosive acid!" Myoga slammed his little derby hat on his equally small stool. "256 takes, and we still haven't got it right! Anko, get me a coffee, I need a break."

"Right away, sir."

Myoga wasn't the only exasperated one among the group. A few feet away, the source of Myoga's vexation was—well—exasperated would be an understatement. The angry waves radiating off Sesshomaru were hot enough to fry any crew person within a five-yard radius. Which would probably explain why the staff was giving him such wide berth.

Why didn't they ever understand? Sesshomaru did not smile like a little girl scout, nor did he read stupid lines like, " Melch's grape juice is the best for us super geniuses because it makes us big and strong." Honestly, who even _says_ that?

He wouldn't. Absolutely not.

Coming to a decision, Sesshomaru got up from behind the fake kitchen counter with dangerous calm then glared at the camera operator nearest him.

"I'm leaving," he announced. And walked off the set.

If it had been anyone else, someone might have gotten up to stop him, but this was Sesshomaru, _the_ Sesshomaru; the first youkai entrepreneur in the history of Southeast Asia, who innovated the modern world purely through tyrannical mindset. Get in his way, and you would find yourself short a limb. It was a simple concept, really.

Fear, was a very simple concept. Sesshomaru understood fear; he lived off its' power. Fear was what could make things happen, fear was what made him who he was, who he is, and who he would be. He liked his fear, and how it fabricated the very existence of his life.

Myoga sighed as Sesshomaru passed his stool without a backward glance. He wouldn't even bother persuading that youkai to stay. "Never again. Damn Inu, just like his father." he muttered bitterly, knowing full well Sesshomaru would hear him.

Sesshomaru almost rolled his eyes and exited the sound stage. He was going to kill Jakken for scheduling this commercial. The green amphibious creature probably planned everything as retribution for when he melted Jakken's filing cabinet last week. Well, he wasn't getting away with it, that was certain.

Stepping out into the gray morning dawn, Sesshomaru decided that it was going to be a very good day.

* * *

Sesshomaru decided that it was going to be a very bad day.

"What do you mean, we don't have any pens! I have to run a board meeting in two minutes, and you don't have any pens!" Sesshomaru slammed his fist down on personal assistant's desk, successfully breaking it in two.

"My desk—!"

"Might as well not even have a board room without any pens. What are we supposed to write with, saliva?"

"—That's not—"

"Of course not, saliva is a translucent liquid, you can't write with that. Plus—" Sesshomaru flipped his long silver hair, "—it's disgusting."

Cowering behind his crippled desk, (and furtively hoping that he wouldn't die) Jakken wondered giddily why he had even applied for this job. Surely not for the pay… or the car... the sleek, shiny, bat-out-of-hell fast, company car.

But five broken desks in the time-span of a month _was_ a bit much. Jakken needed to consult better desk makers. Maybe ones that made them out of solid adamant? Somehow, Jakken figured that even _that_ wouldn't survive Sesshomaru-sama's tantrums. Such was the problem working alongside overzealous and slightly sadistic demon businessmen.

Maybe if he stuck to a cardboard box, he wouldn't have to worry about finding a new desk every time Sesshomaru-sama let his temper get the better of him.

Or he could always nonchalantly mention a few anger-management therapists—

"Jakken."

"S-sorry S-Sesshomaru-sama!"

Sesshomaru glowered impatiently. Out of all the applicants, Jakken was the only one who had the requirements to double as both an attorney and a clerical assistant. Unfortunately, the scaly lizard demon wasn't as voluptuous and sexy as Sesshomaru would like, and thus often became the subject of his abuse.

"Because of your obvious inadequacy, I have no choice but to cancel all of my appointments and reschedule them for a day when we have all the necessary equipment."

"W-what!" Jakken stuttered. "B-but, I-I…you c-can't—"

"I most certainly can." Sesshomaru sounded as if it was the simplest thing in the world. "I'm Sesshomaru, I can do anything."

Jakken winced. "Even the meeting with DextroCom?"

A dark look passed over Sesshomaru's face. "_Especially_ the meeting with DextroCom." He frowned.

Jakken gulped and, sensing danger, decided to blurt out something stupid. "Your brother called again."

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes. "Screw my brother. Send a squadron of assassins to kill him." and with that said, he swished out the door.

Jakken heaved a resigned sigh and scrambled out from under the desk. He wouldn't put it past Sesshomaru to suddenly break something because he found out his brother wasn't dead. Or break things because his brother _was_ dead. Jakken eyed the phone warily and contemplated whether or not he should hire a hit team. Did the Mafia accept long-distance calls?

Once outside the lizard demon's joint office, Sesshomaru smugly tossed a small, metal key and caught it midair. He had to admit, locking seven crates of industrial ballpoint pens in a supply closet was a bit much, but wholly requisite. As an added bonus, he had conned Jakken into canceling all his work for the day… again. It was only fair, after assigning him that stupid commercial. Jakken would be going through the entire day being yelled at by angry corporate businessmen demanding the reason as to why they had to change all their hard-pressed schedules.

With any luck, the slime ball might just cry.

Now, to pretend that he was actually doing something…

Passing a clerk's cubicle, Sesshomaru grabbed a pile of papers as well as other worky-looking paraphernalia and—without breaking his momentum—pretended to sift through them importantly. Experience told him that employees were less likely to approach or make him—God forbid—actually do things, if he looked busy. Not that any worker in their right mind would approach him otherwise, but formalities were taken into consideration.

The long corridor that the businessman was walking down was presently empty, but Sesshomaru had a feeling that it had nothing to do with having a devoted staff. Because he didn't. A more optimistic employer would credit it the fact that they were so dedicated and thus had no time for such menial things like traveling through the building. Sesshomaru knew better. His acute senses could pick up the hushed whisperings of frightened employees, "Wait—don't go out there: he's on the rampage…"

Rampant was an excellent word to describe it. Well, actually, it would be more like bored, and thus looking for ways to make peoples' lives difficult, but rampant sounded more epic.

Over the years, Sesshomaru had learned to pick up the meaning behind certain connotations in peoples voices, especially the different tones of distress. From a dreaded hush to a fully alarmed shriek, he could tell exactly who was afraid and why. A rather convenient skill when one was looking for the exact way to make someone cry.

Purposefully, he twitched a pointed ear in the direction of the most panicked voices, and then grinned. (It was just as well that no one was in the corridor right then, or else they would have found themselves in need of drier pants.)

Room 333: his favorite.

"Morning, Ladies." Sesshomaru said.

Immediately all the women in the room froze. Everyone was obviously thinking the along the same lines: '_so it was going to be one of **those** days_.'

He hadn't even done anything yet and they were already shaking in their stilettos.

"Mizuki, Myumi, Makari—" Sesshomaru nodded to the appropriate cubicles "—Chuck."

"It's Christy!" Christy burst into—oddly manly—tears. "I'm a woman!"

Sesshomaru waved a dismissive hand. "Could've fooled me." Christy bawled louder.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw another girl furiously trying to complete some sort of color-coded filing. Sesshomaru took the opportunity and strode over, making a show of being exasperated.

"What are you doing?" he barked and snatched a puce-colored folder from her shaking hands. "I specifically remember telling you to put the yellow forms into the cerulean folder and the white forms into the manila folder, not the puce!"

"You—I... I—"

"It's so easy, my brother could do it!" Sesshomaru slammed the folder on the desk and sifted through more paperwork. "Blues with the greens, reds with the purple…what are you, color-blind?"

Then as though suddenly realizing something, Sesshomaru made a point of staring at her orange and purple blouse.

"My God, you are."

The girl looked down at the offensive blouse and sniffed wetly.

" If I were you," said Sesshomaru, " I would _definitely_ think about seeing a fashion consultant…"

"You—" he jabbed a finger at an obscure worker, "Come help Bozo the Clown with her filing."

Sesshomaru was about to head over to his next victim, (someone whose new shampoo was making his nose itch) when the girl muttered something that, had it said to anyone else, would have been too soft to hear.

"Who stuck a pole up his ass?"

The entire room collectively winced as Sesshomaru abruptly whirled around and backed the dissident against a cubicle. On the outside, his features looked calm and impassive, but it was the sort of calm like the calm before a storm. He seemed positively dangerous.

"You're the new girl, right?"

New Girl nodded, and gulped. She should have listened to the stories. At the time, she could didn't believe a the cock-and-bull about Sesshomaru burning an entire cabinet into gooey metal, or Sesshomaru crushing a swivel chair with his fist, or Sesshomaru throwing a cubicle straight through a wall and out into the street. But now, she found each and every wives' tale to be as tangible as the fact that she had ten fingers. Which, she fervently hoped that by the end of this escapade, she would still have a few left.

"Humans—" Sesshomaru began, "—have got to be the most pitiful creatures on earth. They are not profitable, all they're good for is… well, nothing, at all… whatsoever."

The girl looked confused. He was just going to rant at her? So, he wasn't going to pummel her brains and drink it's fluids?

"One would think there couldn't be anything possibly lower than a human. But there is. Do you know what that could be?"

She shook her head.

"Human _girls_. They smell weird, they cry, they talk too much, they get hurt too easily… At least demon women can take care of themselves, but human women…"

Sesshomaru looked at New Girl straight on, his golden eyes glinted darkly.

"… Are weak."

She shivered. His eyes were so cold. Slowly, Sesshomaru swiveled halfway around, and then stopped. Almost too suddenly, the inhuman darkness was pushed away and replaced by a more fiendish form of malice.

"And by the gods, do you at least remember what you were doing on the day they passed out common sense?"

She gaped. He wasn't done? How much more of her self-esteem could he possibly bash?

"I can't even begin to fathom what sort of crazed reasoning passes through that pea-brained skull of yours, never mind the parasite that must have possessed you to even consider the possibility of bad-mouthing the most influential, respected enterpriser this side of world--heck, this side of the solar system. I can only assume that you were raised by wild gorillas and thus did not have the opportunity to learn important life skills such as discretion. Naturally, this is just one hypothesis, but one thing is blatantly obvious: you are an incompetent imbecile with little hope to survive in the modern world, let alone reach my stature, granting you no authority to scarcley say a 'good morning' to me."

New Girl blinked. She could feel her legs start to go like jelly.

"Oh, and by the way." Sesshomaru smirked. "You're fired."

Wow. She collapsed to her knees, shocked. The other women in the room gave her sympathetic looks. They _had_ warned her. Never let it be said that anyone out-bested The Sesshomaru.

_Hmm_, thought Sesshomaru, _It's not even noon, I've already fired someone and reduced two girls to tears. I'm on a roll_. He directed his attention back to Shampoo Girl. _Make that three girls. _

Then his mobile rang.

Damn. Just when it was getting exciting, too. He couldn't possibly imagine who in their right mind would call him now. Few people had his number and even fewer actually used it. The only person who it could conceivably be would be his father, which he very much hoped it wasn't. Fervently, he checked the caller ID. He didn't recognize the number. Then who…?

"Hello?" he asked warily.

"Yo."

"How the HELL did you get this number!" Sesshomaru roared into the receiver.

"Aww, come on. You should be happy to hear from me," the familiar voice teased.

"It was Jakken, wasn't it?" Sesshomaru groaned. "There goes my day, straight down the tubes… stupid, green, unsexy, miserable piece of sh—"

He could almost hear the smile on the other line. "I'm sorry, brother, what was that?"

"Inuyasha, whatever it is—No."

"But you haven't even heard what I have to say—"

"I swear, Inuyasha," Sesshomaru yelled, " if I have to give you sex advice ONE MORE TIME I am going to kick your castrated ass to Cambodia and enroll you into a service of monk hood!"

Judging by the odd stares, he had said that one a little too loud.

"Believe me, I have a friend: let's just say monk hood didn't do him much good." Inuyasha snorted. "Anyways, that wasn't why I was calling…"

"No." Sesshomaru stormed out of the room. He was going to wring his hands around that toad's scrawny little neck.

"Come on, I haven't even—"

"No."

"Look, I need a job…"

Sesshomaru snorted derisively.

"Don't be like that, man." Inuyasha tried to sound diplomatic. "Look, with your connections, all you have to do is pull a few strings, it doesn't have to be anything big, a recommendation to a local burger joint, even. As long as it has your signature—"

"Right, and as soon as you blow up said burger joint, my accreditation instantly becomes a complete joke."

"Hey, I only blew up a restaurant once." Inuyasha said tactfully.

Sesshomaru was nearing the end of the hall and almost to Jakken's joint office. The reptile was going to pay very dearly. He charged through the door and noticed gleefully that the toad had been crying, if the red blotchy color around Jakken's eyes was anything to go by.

"Yo, Sesshomaru, are you even listening to me?"

"Excuse me, little brother—"

Jakken's already bulging eyes widened,

"—I have yet another employee I have to…" Sesshomaru paused, "…take care of." he snapped his phone shut dramatically.

Jakken nervously sifted the papers on the half of broken desk that he managed to keep upright and ran his hand across his runny, red nose. Sesshomaru noted that he looked like he was about to cry again. That was good.

"Sesshomaru-sama, I can explain—"

Sesshomaru's glare said, '_five seconds_.'

"—I had to call so many people, and then your idiot of a brother kept holding up the lines, so I couldn't get through to the people on the other side and the people on the other side didn't like that and said that they thought I was being rude and inconsiderate, especially after that ridiculous cancellation—I mean—not ridiculous, not at all, perfectly reasonable, I could say, because we all know that pens are very crucial to the function of board meetings, really, and I completely understand—"

"Jaken." Sesshomaru said warningly.

Jakken gulped. "What I mean to say is, that… I gave Inuyasha your number to shut him up and leave me alone."

Sesshomaru rubbed his temple and frowned. "What happened to giving him Chuck's number? It worked last time."

Jakken sighed dejectedly. "I know, but he wouldn't buy it. He said Christy's voice sounded too manly to be yours."

"And the squadron of assassins?"

Jakken looked panicked.

"Never mind," Sesshomaru looked bored and scratched a little doodle onto the side of Jakken's already mutilated desk. "Maybe next time. I'll probably have to do the job myself." Jakken let out a small breath of relief.

"Oh yes, I almost forgot," he added conversationally, "I fired another secretary today. You'll have to set up an interview for another."

Jakken's relieved expression slid off his face and he slammed his small skull on the desk. "Sesshomaru-sama, why do you even _have_ that many secretaries?"

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes. "They are all very crucial to the success of this company." _and my anger ventilation plan_.

"Right." Jakken shrunk a little in his seat and hastily scribbled something on a little planner near his computer. "Anything else?"

" I want you to go out and buy me some strawberry Jell-O. They come in individual cups now, did you know?"

"Right." Jakken repeated and pressed the speed-dial button for MalWart. "I'll have them send the box to your office. And here's the order form for the new pens." With his free hand, Jakken handed Sesshomaru a clipboard.

But that would mean he actually had to sit down at his desk and _do_ something. He snatched the clipboard and stomped off to his office.

"Drama Queen." Jakken muttered.

"What was that?" Sesshomaru growled from the next room.

"Nothing."

"Thought so."

Sesshomaru wearily sat down in his high-backed, leather chair and set the clipboard on his great mahogany desk.

In all it's contemporary luxury, his office itself was elegant in it's simplicity. Other than a floor rug with an intricate pattern of cherry blossoms, there was little decoration. In actuality, the feature that made the room truly breathtaking was the tinted glass window that covered the entire expanse of the back wall and towered over all of downtown Tokyo, four floors up. On occasion, he would watch as pedestrians swarmed across the street, pouring into a massive crosswalk. Other times he would throw things out the windows and watch people stop running to shriek and scurry out of the way. Sometimes they were too slow and got brained with a glass paperweight.

Windows were very fun things, Sesshomaru decided.

Someone knocked on the door. _Oo, MalWart sure delivers fast_.

"Come in.," he said.

Sesshomaru was then disappointed when, instead of a uniformed deliveryman, a smelly other person poked into his office.

"Go away, Koga. I'm busy."

Koga looked impatient. "I'm sure."

"No really," Sesshomaru complained. "I can't decide to get clicky-tops or twisty-bottoms…" he waved the clipboard with the pen order form. "Clicky-tops are naturally easier to use, but the twisty bottoms look so much sleeker…"

Koga leaned against the door with his security guard uniform pressing against the doorframe and, for the first time, Sesshomaru noticed that there was something different about his demeanor. His mouth was pulled into a serious line and his eyes looked almost worried.

"Sesshomaru-sama, we have a problem."

Upon closer inspection, Sesshomaru realized that he had been wrong in assuming that the disgusting smell had come from the wolfish security guard. He also became cognizant of the fact that not only one person was deigned with his presence, but two. And the second person was quite small.

He covered his hands over his nose. "Who is that?"

Koga pulled the little girl from behind him with reluctance. Had Sesshomaru been a lesser man, he would have winced.

The girl's brown hair was matted with drying blood and she had scratches running up her arms. Her right eye was swollen shut from a deep purple bruise smashed against her cheek. When she staggered forward, Koga had to hold onto her arms for support because she looked like she was about to topple over.

The hand covering his nose clamped down harder. Human.

"We found her outside the building." Koga said. "She wouldn't let any of the human security guards near her, let alone touch her. We didn't think bringing her to the local hospital was wise." he dropped his voice lower. " 'Cuz of Kagura, you know?"

"So you brought her… to me."

Koga nodded hopefully.

" Out."

Koga winced. "But you can't—I mean, just look at her! She's practically dying!"

"Humans die. It's what they do." Sesshomaru glared coldly.

Koga narrowed his eyes and glared back. "Bastard." he spat. "You're probably too scared that she'll get human cooties on your pretty fingernails. That's all you kennel breeds are good for: prancing around and showing off."

Unfortunately for Koga, Sesshomaru knew exactly what the wolf demon was trying to do. However, unlike his brother, petty insults would not work as means for persuasion.

"I don't see you doing anything about it."

He shrugged. "I guess I figured you could do something, is all. But whatever, I'm sure you couldn't help this girl even if she had a paper cut."

A provocation of authority, on the other hand, worked very well.

"Is that a challenge?" growled Sesshomaru.

Koga looked him squarely in the eye. "Might be."

Snappishly, Sesshomaru pushed back his chair, slamming it against the window, and strode over to the girl, wrenching the child away from Koga.

"Fine." he said through clenched teeth, "Now go."

Koga lumbered out and Sesshomaru threw the door closed behind him, seething.

Throughout this exchange, the little girl didn't seem to be upset in the manner of which she was being manhandled and haggled over like a piece of festering meat. She was even starting to show the characteristics of a piece of festering meat, but that didn't seem to bother her either. In fact, (if her droopy eyes and deadpan expression were anything to go by) she appeared positively bored.

Sesshomaru looked down at the child wobbling at his side, albeit slightly confused as to how Koga had talked him into taking care of her. Koga had always been one of the more persuasive of his personnel.

Stupid wolves.

Surveying his room, Sesshomaru realized that surprisingly for an office so obviously violent, he was lacking in any sort of bandaging. He wondered if he should ask Jakken to go get him some.

That was when the girl began to sway dangerously, her eyes fluttering closed. Then she toppled over and passed out unto the floor, unconscious.

* * *

**A/N: **So that's the end of this chapter! Next one should be here by the end of this week, so check this space! Please review! Anything from "You freakin' suck" to "Holy #!, why the hell were you even born!?" are totally welcome.

**Edit**: No, I'm not dead. Third chapter will be coming up, I promise…


	2. Vampire Hunters and Elven Lords

**Disclaimer:** You all should be glad I don't own Inuyasha. The drawings would suck, and there would be absolutely no plot in favor of poorly-drawn characters running around shirtless.

**Author's Note:** Heh… really late update… sorry about that. For those of you who reviewed, thank you soo much. Although I didn't get the chance to thank you back, they really made my day! I started running around and squealing (and generally annoying the liver out of my family.)

* * *

Upon regaining consciousness, Rin could vaguely note a positive change in her surroundings. She was not lying on that rough asphalt sidewalk nor was she standing under the glaring floodlights of that awful building. Surprisingly, she actually felt comfortable.

Then, to her dismay, she realized that she was moving unpleasantly fast. How she was moving fast, she couldn't imagine, seeing as she could hardly move… she seemed to be restrained by a strap holding her from shoulder to waist.

Nauseous, she clutched her stomach with one hand and covered her mouth with the other.

"Don't you dare throw up on the leather seats, human, I just had them cleaned."

Rin's eyes widened.

Sesshomaru looked over his shoulder at the girl then turned his attention back to the road. So, she was finally awake… he could see her staying unnervingly still, as if she thought that by not moving she could maybe turn invisible. 'A deer caught in the headlights,' as the saying went.

"You're awake." He said knowledgably.

Silence.

"So…what's your name?"

The girl didn't answer.

"Do you even have a name?" Sesshomaru asked, a little exasperated.

She nodded slowly.

"Good." He said aloud. "At least you're not completely deaf then, just mentally retarded."

"I am not!" the girl exclaimed, forgetting she was supposed to be mute.

Sesshomaru smirked. "Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not." Rin folded her arms across her chest, and then winced as her bandages rubbed together. She blinked down at them.

Cautiously, she moved her hands up to her head, where another strip of gauze was wrapped around her forehead and down over her right eye. Both legs were also wrapped in bandages. She probably looked a bit like a mummy, she thought.

"You did this?" she asked.

"Hmph."

"Thank you."

"Hmph."

The car was silent for a moment.

"My name's Rin." She said abruptly.

"Hmph."

"What's your name?"

Sesshomaru kept driving.

"Do you even have a name?" Rin asked impatiently.

He rolled his eyes. "Alright, alright. I get it."

"Good." She continued. "At least you're not completely deaf, just—"

"I think I liked you better when you were comatose and bleeding."

Rin nodded. "Thanks, I think you're pretty cool too."

Sesshomaru rubbed his forehead wearily. Good god, what had he done to deserve this? Oh sure, maybe he shouldn't have fired that secretary because she laughed at his shoes, and maybe he shouldn't have thrown Jakken's Spice Girl mug through the roof, and maybe drowning Inuyasha's pet bunny was a little mean…

But really, he hadn't done anything _that_ bad.

"Helloooo?" Rin warbled and waved. "Anyone home?"

Determined, Sesshomaru glared out at the windshield. Just a few more miles until they reached his suite. Or, according to that sign, one more exit until "Taraboose Creek." Creeks were convenient for drowning annoying children.

"Fine. Don't talk. See if I care." Rin paused to see if he would say anything, and when he didn't, she hopped up on her knees toward the window, looking outside.

She pressed her nose against the tinted glass. It was kind of shady outside, as if it would be only a few more hours until sunset. Rin liked sunset. It was pretty and all the colors made her feel warm and safe. She didn't like night. Night was dark, and you couldn't see things. It was dangerous, bad things happened at night.

Rin blew a little air out her nose and giggled when it steamed up the window. She blew more air, trying to cover the whole glass with fog. Then she lifted a finger and drew little faces on it.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. What an odd girl.

When she tried to press her whole hand against the glass, she drew back in pain. "Ow." She lifted a corner of the bandage; her palm was raw and scraped.

"Hey, driver man, how did I get these?" Rin asked, waving her hands in the air.

"You don't remember?" Sesshomaru was surprised.

Rin shook her head.

"Well, I don't know anything about it." he said impatiently. "You were just dropped into my office and fainted."

"Oh, I remember that." it was Rin's turn to sound impatient. "I got picked up by werewolves on the sidewalk—wait—why was I on the sidewalk? Hey! There are werewolves in Japan! That's cool! Did you know there were werewolves in Japan? I didn't—"

"So you don't remember anything before my security guards found you?"

Rin's eyes got big. "You have werewolves for security guards?" she wiggled in her seat. "That is soo cool! Are you like a vampire hunter or something? And those werewolves are like your subordinates, because you trained them to be good guys, so now you fight the evils of the underworld together!" She cupped a hand over her mouth and whispered conspiratorially, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone your secret. You are my savior, after all. Can I be in your vampire-hunting coven…?"

Sesshomaru gave her an odd look.

"…I might not be able to do much," Rin went on. "But I'm sure I can string pieces of garlic together, for now. Then, when I get bigger, I can be your pupil and you can teach me all your vampire-hunting ways! So when you die, I'll take over the coven and avenge your death! Can I have a giant sword? And a cape! With red sparkles that say, 'AVENGER' on the—"

"Oh, look," Sesshomaru interrupted all too eagerly, "We're here."

Nearly ripping out her seat belt, Rin jumped out of the car, keen to see a vampire hunter's 'hideout.'

Sesshomaru watched, amused, as the girl's face promptly fell. "An… apartment building?"

Sesshomaru snorted. Any other person would have been impressed with the towering, state-of-the-art structure, exotic flora, and acre-long swimming pool. Only the most affluent, influential persons were allowed to even walk into this place, let alone afford to live in it.

'An apartment building,' indeed.

Rin sighed and looked bored at the building. "Well, that's kinda lame." She noticed that Sesshomaru was just sitting there she rapped on Sesshomaru's window. "Oi! Are you getting out? You better not be thinking about leaving me here and driving off!"

Sesshomaru took the key out of the ignition and opened the door, with the air of someone about to spend an evening taking care of a temperamental rhinoceros, and pretended not to notice as the door banged into the girl, knocking her to the ground. _Ha_, he thought briefly, stepping over the body and towards the glass double-doors without a backward glance.

"Stupid vampire hunters," muttered Rin, getting up and toddling after Driver Man, "think they don't have to worry about manners, just because they kill dangerous things…"

But he wasn't particularly paying attention to her monologue, seeing as a uniformed bellhop was already ushering Sesshomaru inside. "Hey!" Rin yelled, "Come back here!" She pushed past the employee, who promptly grabbed her, keeping the loud girl from making it past the entrance.

"Let go of me!" yelped Rin, "I need to join that guy's coven!"

The bellhop gave her an odd look. "Sorry, miss. I'm afraid I can't let you pass. VIP only."

Glancing behind him, Sesshomaru sighed. _So annoying_, he thought, seeing the girl kick the boy. She was yelling something or other. Perhaps he should just leave her there… Against his better judgment, He backtracked to the front of the building.

"—I am _to_ important!" the girl was saying. "That man—" she froze, as she noticed him, then waved eagerly, "See there he is! See, tell this guy that I'm going to help you kick evil vampire butt…"

"She with you?" the bellhop sounded like he sincerely hoped she was.

"Yes." Sesshomaru sounded like he sincerely wished she wasn't.

Rin punched the air triumphantly. "HA!" She hurried over to Sesshomaru and stuck her tongue out at Mean Guy In Red Elfish Getup. "Told ya so!" For emphasis she grabbed his hand and waved it around.

The bellhop looked relieved and surprised at the same time.

"Let go of my hand, human." Sesshomaru growled.

Grumpily, Rin obliged, then took in her rescuer's appearance for the very first time. "Oo, you have pretty hair!" she observed.

"I know." he probably said that more smug than necessary.

"Can I touch it?"

"No."

The odd couple made their way past the reception desk (past the receptionist who squealed a, "Good afternoon, Sesshomaru-sama!") and into the elevator, Rin making further comments about Sesshomaru's hair and how soft it was and how she wondered what sort of shampoo he used, all through which he remained silent.

The elevator ride up to the topmost suites was also unbearably loud and annoying. While that guy-whose-only-job-was-to-push-those-elevator-buttons (thankfully) didn't ask any questions, Sesshomaru could tell he was intrigued by the child bouncing up and down and squealing whenever the elevator stopped on floor. Sesshomaru found himself seriously wishing that he didn't live on the topmost floor, not wanting to prolong the agony any longer.

Ding.

"WEEEE!"

Sesshomaru had always prided himself on being mentally stable, and never thought that one day he would think otherwise. But seeing this scruffy little human skipping around in a space no bigger than a king-sized refrigerator—singing god knows what at the top of her lungs—the forbearing demon admitted that, yes, he was going a little insane.

Ding.

"WAHOO!"

"Your floor, Sesshomaru-sama."

"Oh, thank the gods." Sesshomaru breathed, the elevator-guy jolted in shock (Sesshmaru-sama actually talking?) and all but ran out the elevator doors. ('All but ran,' because stoic businessmen/fearsome demons did not run away from little girls.)

Rin gave a thumbs up to the elevator guy and followed suit, "Wait for me Vampire Slayer Man!"

As a guy who dealt with moving rich, snotty people up and down in elevators all day, Mr. Elevator Dude didn't see many wild little girls hobbling around the place. And if he ever were to guess who he would see them with, his last bet would be with The Sesshomaru-sama.

He pressed the upside-down arrow on the elevator panel and it shuddered downward, moving to pick up more businessmen and women.

* * *

Usually, after a tiring day of work (which usually consisted of not doing any work at all) Sesshomaru would sit down under his lamp and read a book. Sometimes, when he was just too worn-out (on days he actually did have to do things) he would make a pot of tea and take a nap. Other days consisted of various peaceful activities generally done to promote tranquility.

Although this would surprise those who knew him, Sesshomaru was rather peaceful when left alone to his own devices. At home, he was a completely different person than in the workplace. Since there was hardly anyone terrorize, it left him with more conventional means to vent his boredom, as opposed to anger. (Unless the toaster decided to be difficult, then there would be hell to pay.)

In conclusion: Sesshomaru liked to relax when he got home. And right now, he was _definitely_ not relaxing.

"Get down from there—get over here—DON'T TOUCH THAT!"

Rin giggled as she let go of a Ming vase, about to throw it across the suite on the whim that the precious vase would, 'look pretty as mosaic tiles.'

"You know," Rin thought aloud, making her way to the kitchen and marching purposely over to the fridge, "you sure have a lot of fancy stuff for a humble vampire hunter." she opened the refrigerator door and inspected the contents inside.

"I thought they were supposed be all poor, you know? Not living in some fancy hotel with maid service and stuff—hey, you have a lot of Jell-O in here, is that some kind of vampire hunter thing? Do you mind if I have some?" Rin reached for one of the plastic, individually sealed cups, overbalanced, and knocked over a carton of eggs instead. The fragile shells went crashing to the marble tile, splattering it with yellow yolk and crushed eggshell.

"Enough!" yelled Sesshomaru and he stormed over to the walking doomsday device, and then scooped the startled girl, slinging her over his back and pushing her unto a sofa.

He bent down on one knee and fixed the girl with The Glare of Doom. She kept quiet, in favor of keeping her life.

"All right, listen: let's get this straight, " Sesshomaru began. Rin gulped. "I am not—let me repeat—NOT—a vampire hunter in any way, shape or form. I do not _live_ in a vampire hunter's lair, I do not _own_ vampire hunter things, I do not _have_ werewolf subordinates, and you are not to _become_ my subordinate."

Rin processed this all slowly. Her face showed the inner working of her mind, turning the cogs and trying to make sense of things.

"So then," she finally said. "Are you an elf? Because your ears—"

"NO!" Sesshomaru nearly clawed his face in frustration. "I am not any superhero/mythical faerie of any sort! I did not save you from anything whatsoever. I also do not think you are my friend, nor do I want to keep you any longer than I have to. In fact, as soon as I find a way to get rid of you inconspicuously I am going to jump at that glorious chance and leave you in the dust with all your dusty little human dust mites. _Are we perfectly clear_?"

This time, the girl stayed silent.

Sesshomaru smirked. "Good." He got up and sauntered to his bedroom. "I have to do… paperwork. Paperwork for my completely, utterly normal job seeing as I'm not a crime fighter against the evils of Vampirism."

As he passed the corner, the demon checked briefly that the human was not, in fact, going to go on another crazy rampage. Satisfied with what he saw, he turned and closed the door.

Abandoned, Rin stared hollowly at the floor.

* * *

When Sesshomaru woke up from his nap—no, wait—"paperwork," he realized that he probably left the human child alone for too long. It hadn't been more than an hour…

…Which was plenty of time for that girl to completely destroy his flat.

With the air of someone preparing for battle, Sesshomaru slipped on his (masculine) fluffy slippers and pulled into a pair of cotton pajama pants. He wondered if he should have put on headgear too, against the threat of sharp, deadly projectiles.

Cautiously, he pressed a demon-enhanced ear against his bedroom door, and—not hearing any explosives—pushed it open. He was surprised by the lack of noise, remembering that the girl's methods of chaos were loud.

Maybe the damn thing had decided to become stealthier.

Sesshomaru didn't want to be the one to let his guard down and suffer for it, so he treaded down the small hallway on full alert. He had every canine sense in use: hearing for burst pipes, sniffing for mass amounts of rubble…

And again, nothing.

In the living room, the girl who had, just hours before, been bouncing off the walls, was presently staring distantly at nothing. If Sesshomaru didn't know any better, he would think that she was a rather large stuffed animal. A dead stuffed animal, covered in bandages and scruffily worn all over.

Sesshomaru coughed loudly.

The girl jerked a bit—startled—glanced at him, then continued burning a hole into the wall with her eyes.

So that was how it was going to be, huh? Well, two could play at this game. Sesshomaru was well experienced in The Game. He could outdo anyone with the silent treatment. One would say it was his specialty.

Almost flaunting, Sesshomaru went into the kitchen and came back with a Jell-O and a spoon. He settled himself in the chair right in front of the girl, and then ripped off the aluminum seal.

Rin narrowed her eyes, watching him eat. Honestly, for a guy that tried to act all holier-than-thou, he sure was fussy. But this girl knew how to play her cards right, and play them right, she would.

It was her turn to go into the kitchen, and this time she came back with _two_ Jell-O cups.

_Fat Pig._ Sesshomaru thought.

Calmly and passively, Rin set the jellied treats down on the carpet…

…And promptly began stomping on them.

Sesshomaru tried not to twitch as she slaughtered the snack and splattered it in red jellied clumps all over his clean, white carpet. Damn her, those stains would be so hard to get out. And the wasted Jell-O! It was sacrilege!

Rin gave him a measured look, and sat back down on the couch with deliberation.

Sesshomaru sat in his chair and glared.

Rin sat on the couch and glared back.

Sesshomaru sat in his chair.

Rin sat on the couch.

And an epic battle of sitting ensued.

"OK!" Rin finally screamed. "You win!" She jumped up on the couch and shouted to the ceiling, "You're STUPID, and MEAN, but you won ANYWAYS!" then she chucked a pillow at his head. "Think you're SO COOL, just because you have STUPIDLY PRETTY HAIR!!"

_Well_, Sesshomaru thought wisely, _I am pretty_.

"And then you… and then you…" Rin broke off and wiped a hand across her face, "You just don't care…that…you…you don't care that…" She sniffled again, and—to Sesshomaru's horror—he realized she was _crying_.

This human child was _insane_. Popped out of a freakin' peanut insane. In the span of a couple hours, this girl had managed to go from shy to bubbly to rampant to quiet to defiant to angry to hysteric. And from the high-pitched yowl coming from that mouth, one could hardly call that crying… the girl sounded like she was being torn limb from limb through medieval torture devices.

The person who was knocking on the door seemed to think so, too.

"Dammit." Sesshomaru muttered. Efficiently, he grabbed the bawling girl by her shirt and tossed her into the coat closet, then shut the door, muffling the ear-splitting sound to a dull blare.

"What do you—Go away."

The woman at the door frowned and pushed her bangs out of her face. "You should be more appreciative of your housekeeping, Sesshomaru-sama."

"You, Sango, are not here to do housekeeping, you are here to snoop around into my business, as per usual." Sesshomaru pointed out.

"Right-O!" Sango grinned and tried to push her trolley inside. A little scuffle developed as the housekeeper tried making her way past the demon's barricade, resulting in an irritable Sesshomaru as the trolley banged his more private bits. "Entertaining a lady friend, I see. Sounded like she was having one hell of a time."

"You could say that."

Sango looked relieved. "Thank god, I always said it was about time you got laid. (And stopped being so anal). Don't want to keep you, then."

Sesshomaru's face remained dangerously calm as the maid, thinking it a job well done, skipped away, pulling the service cart as she went.

Humans… were totally unbearable. It seemed as if there was some sort of unwritten rule that, in order to be written down as "human" you had to be completely barking. It made sense, in retrospect. It would explain a lot of where his brother came from.

"Heyph! Leff meh owff!!" and now, the insane human was banging on the coat closet door, further adding to his over-worked mind.

He giddily weighed the possibility of just leaving her there.

And weighed it…

Then the girl started yelling. Screaming, actually, was a better word. She was screeching so loud Sesshomaru's over-sensitive ears were starting to pound.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAH—Umph!" Rin toppled out of the closet, plopping unto the floor and glaring at her emancipator through scraggly brown bangs.

Sesshomaru stared down at her. "Are you quite finished now?"

Rin mumbled something under her breath that made Sesshomaru quirk an eyebrow.

"Quite the vocabulary you got there, young lady."

"Yeah, well, you're a stupid-face."

Sesshomaru smirked. "What happened to me being pretty?"

Moving over back to the living room and claiming her rightful place on the sofa, Rin grumbled, "Just because you look like a fruitcake doesn't mean you're smart. You're stupid. Your face is stupid. Stupidly stupid, the stupidest stupid face in the whole stupid world filled with stupider people, but you're the stupidest." taking a breath, she added, as an afterthought, "And meanest."

"Well, then," Sesshomaru said, sounding pleased, "my work here is done." he moved over to the kitchen and started pulling out plates from the cupboard. "And as your reward, you don't get to starve."

"Maybe I don't want to eat." grouched the girl, bandaged arms crossed over her chest.

"Good. It'll just make my job easier if you die before I find how to get rid of you. Although, if you're planning to kill yourself, I suggest freezing to death. I've heard it's the least messy."

" 'Get rid of you' " Rin repeated. "You make it sound as if I'm a sack of moldy potatoes."

Sesshomaru continued about the kitchen, throwing in bits of vegetables and meat into the stir-fry. "I think you rather smell like a sack of moldy potatoes."

Testing his theory, Rin gave herself a sniff, and then wrinkled her nose in distaste. Ok, so maybe she did smell a bit off. But it wasn't her fault she was covered with gross bandages… or was it?

She rubbed her forehead, dazedly. It felt like she was forgetting something very important. But it also felt like that important something was something she didn't want to remember. That it would be even more painful to remember, if she did try. For something that wasn't even there, memory loss sure exhausted the brain.

Sesshomaru came out of the kitchen with two plates of food. He put one steaming plate on the coffee table between his chair and hers, and kept the other for himself; picking up his chopsticks.

"You know—" he said casually, "—I've also heard poison is an equally non-messy form of death." then made a point of taking a long time to bring the food to his mouth.

"You'd better not have." Rin grumbled as she picked up the plate and started shoveling the noodles down her throat at an amazing speed. Sesshomaru had barely finished chewing his first bite when she polished off the entire plate.

She wiped one arm across her mouth and held out the empty plate with the other. "More." she belched.

Sesshomaru stared, aghast.

"Fine," she lifted herself off the couch and bounded into the kitchen. "I'll just get it myself."

Alarmed with the thought of that creature destroying his precious kitchen appliances, the demon set down his meal and dashed into the kitchen. Sure enough, the girl was balancing the stir-fry pan in one hand and standing precariously on one foot, dangerously close to toppling over and dropping the entire pan on the kitchen floor.

And then she did drop it; noodles and vegetables flew across the kitchen, clumps of meat stuck to the sides of the cupboard and lodged themselves in Sesshomaru's hair.

There was no way this human was staying here alone tomorrow. Nor would Sesshomaru be able to survive having her in the office. Who knew what mayhem this child could achieve, given the circumstances. The silver-haired demon found he probably didn't want to find out.

"You—" he growled, a piece of noodle sliding off his face and unto the floor, "—in the living room… NOW."

The girl hastily obeyed, all but flying into the other room.

Now that he was alone in the kitchen, Sesshomaru took the opportunity to abuse his Super Demon Powers. He whipped out a claw, pushing his youki outward and concentrating on that one spot until his hand was covered in glowing green poison. With skill passed and learned from generations of Inu demons, he whirled around, shooting glowing acid at the kitchen, watching as the mellowed-out alteration on this technique completely dissolved all the organic materials in the kitchen.

Who knew diluted demon acid made such a good household cleaner? Maybe a little _too_ good; if any human were to touch this stuff, however weakened; they would find themselves short a few fingers.

"Wow! That was awesome!!"

Sesshomaru whirled around, saw the girl coming towards the acid-bubbling kitchen, and instinctively caught her by her shirt collar and marched her back into the living room.

"I told you to stay in here!"

"Since when do I ever listen to evil people?" Rin snorted. "Besides, I would have missed out on that awesome light show! Where did you learn to do that? Can you teach me? I'll be the best student you ever had, I swear! Maybe that's what you do: professionally clean people's houses with wicked ninja moves! Wait—are you a ninja?"

"You could have died."

Rin looked confused, trying to reach around to look at his face. "I thought you wanted me to die. 'Make my job easier' and all that stuff." when he didn't answer, she went on, "What was that, by the way? It didn't look too dangerous to me."

"That—" Sesshomaru lowered her down unto the couch, "—was an ancient fighting technique passed down from generations of our family."

Rin furrowed stuck out her lip and looked further confused. "You come from long line of housekeepers?"

Sesshomaru resisted the temptation to smack his forehead. "Are all humans this mentally challenged? Do you honestly not know who I am?"

Rin looked up at him and squinted her eyes, scrutinizing his appearance. Then her eyes widened in dawning comprehension.

"Legolas, the elf of the Sindar, and member of the Fellowship of the Ring?" she guessed.

This time, Sesshomaru did smack his forehead. "Alright, I give up. I fear that if I talk to you for any longer, my brain cells will shrivel up and die."

"No, no wait!" she yelled at his retreating back. "Aren't you going to tuck me in?"

Sesshomaru just kept walking away to his bedroom. If today was any indication, he was going to need his sleep.

"I'll probably be up all night, because I wasn't put to bed properly!" she continued to yell. "Here I'll be; tossing and turning on this sofa, and it'll be all your fault!"

When Rin realized that her hollering was doing no good, she huffed and spread herself out on the sofa. "I'm never going to get any rest like this." She muttered bitterly

As soon as her head hit the couch, she instantly crashed into a deep sleep.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Please review! I really would like to know what people think of this story. I write to get better, and to get better I need to know what to improve on. Although a simple, "You suck." is ok, a "You suck because your face is fat." is encouraged. And this is my spring break, so you know what that means: Faster updates! (Or so we'll hope ::sweatdrop:: )


	3. A Most Unfortunate Accident

**Disclaimer: **Do I seriously need to write a statement proclaiming just how much I don't own Inuyasha? Because that's just ridiculous.

**Author's Note:** Haha, I can't believe I'm actually doing this. It's been, like, what? Two years? I found this old document in the middle of a hard-drive purge and rediscovered my fanfiction account. Since my absence, it seems that FF. net has gotten a new makeover. Snazzy. Winced at my profile. This story was an agonizing read; I started laughing aloud at how ridiculous it all sounded. But then I read the reviews. You guys are so sweet. I feel bad about (quite literally) forgetting this story. Although I can't promise I'll finish the entire story, I am posting the found document (the beginning of chapter three).

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Rin knew she was dreaming immediately.

This was a strange admission because, usually, when one is dreaming, they don't realize it until after the fact; when they wake up and find themselves panting in cold sweat, with the aftermath of seemingly real terror nothing but a watery hallucination.

Later, Rin would understand why she compared this dream to a nightmare.

But for now, the illusionary hills of yellow buttercups and white daisies offered her no such terror. A smiling sun laughed against its peaceful blue sky. A crop of green grass and bright wildflowers almost tickled her bare toes. Rin smiled. At the moment, all was just fine and dandy.

With nothing better to do, Rin stretched out and started picking flowers. She took care to pluck each little root completely out of the ground and keep the fragile stems intact. Soon, Rin could say she had a sizable bouquet.

That was when she heard the singing.

The disembodied song permeated every crevice of her dream-induced haze. Rin supposed she should be alarmed, but the familiar and soothing lullaby nullified her wariness.

In a series of soft slurs, the song started out quiet, almost shyly. Then it rose into a crescendo, the words gaining confidence and feeling, bringing about mental visions of warm summers and happy springs, each verse and chorus twirling together a sense of peace and inner tranquility.

_Come now, my child, it will be all right_

_Springtime and Summer have frozen to Fall_

_Winter is coming, so I'll hold you tight_

_Be wary of darkness, Run from the fog_

_No matter the cost, I'll protect you from night…_

She remembered this song.

With sudden urgency, Rin raced forward into the deeper parts of the field and darker parts of the surrounding forest. This music that brought back flickers of memory, this music that sparked recollection… maybe if she found out where it was coming from, Rin thought, maybe she could remember…

Maybe she could remember what? What who? Why what who? Why who did what how?

It was very frustrating, even in a dream, to think and run at the same time.

It was also very frustrating when, upon thinking and running, you crashed right into the thing you were thinking and running for.

The woman with familiar eyes and long dark hair didn't seem to mind much, though. She stopped her singing and smiled at Rin, whose face was flattened against her leg.

The colorful bouquet lay a few feet away, abandoned.

"There you are." the woman said. " I was starting to wonder if you'd even show up." She scooped the disheveled girl into her arms and sat down on the grass. "I figured the song would help."

This confused Rin, and she tried to wriggle out of the woman's hold. "Who—"

"Not now, dear." the woman pressed her finger to her lips and made a 'shushing' sound. "We don't have much time—"

"Wait! I have to get those flowers…"

"Don't!" the woman's dark eyes widened and her pretty face grew alarmed. "You can't… I mean… I mean, that is to say…"

But Rin had already scrambled out of the woman's lap and onto the forest floor. "Don't be silly, it'll only take a minute."

As soon as her small hand curled around the bouquet, the entire world collapsed.

It was then that her confusingly sweet dream was thrown into black, catatonic chaos. From a confusingly sweet dream to a terrifying nightmare, the transition was dangerously abrupt. The flowers in Rin's hand withered and died, each crinkled petal fell and became sucked into dry, barren ground. Dark clouds tore across the now blood-red sky, an eerie crimson moon bathing the world in blood.

Someone started to scream.

"He's here," the woman said to the howling sky.

Then she collapsed to the ground.

Rin stood frozen with eyes open in silent horror.

"He's here," the woman said again, this time clutching a bloodied shoulder. When she raised her head, her face was marred with scratches and bruises. Blood blossomed on her white blouse as more and more wounds suddenly appeared on her body.

A pool of blood started to spread from under the woman's ripped dress.

"Go!" screamed the woman. "Leave before He finds you!"

Rin started to cry. She took an instinctive step forward, stretching out her hand. "I can't—I can't just leave you—not—not—"

"Just GO!"

But she couldn't. Rin could only cry, her was world spinning, her mind was screaming—

_**WAKE UP!**_

Rin jolted out of her sleep when she was shoved roughly off the couch and onto the carpeted floor, swallowing a mouthful of fluffy carpet grossness.

"Damn human. Figures you can't even be reasonably quiet while you're sleeping."

Although still disoriented with a throbbing pain above her left eye, Rin tried to give the man towering above her a well-deserved glare.

But upon a second look at her rude awakener, she let out a small yelp. Within reason, upon taking in his appearance.

He had a terrible glower on his face; complete with dark shadowed eyes. His usually immaculate hair that she had once so admired was now in utter disarray. Odd bits stood up at the back and there were pieces of bed lint stuck in randomly. If he didn't look so frighteningly tired, Rin would have giggled.

"I had a bad dream," she explained.

Sesshomaru grunted something that could be either interpreted as a, "Screw you," or a, "I'm going to take a shower. Don't break anything."

The sluggish demon counterpart staggering away from the living room was a completely different person from the serious man Rin had seen only hours ago. She realized that saying Captor Dude was not a morning person would be quite the understatement.

When the last bit of his bedraggled hair disappeared into the bathroom. Rin wondered wildly what this guy would be like drunk. Before realizing, of course, that she was underage and it would be quite difficult getting massive amounts of sake, let alone being able to force-feed the sake to a person who was three times her size and had pointy teeth. Pointy teeth hurt a lot when they bit you. Being bitten by pointy teeth could lead to infection including—but not limited to—rabies.

Rin didn't really know what 'rabies' was, but she figured it was something weird and inconvenient like warts.

But she digresses.

The issue was certainly not her rescuer's case of bed head. The issue was that, now, Rin found herself very alone with very dark dreams swirling around her head.

_The flowers in Rin's hand withered and died, each crinkled petal fell and became sucked into dry, barren ground. Dark clouds tore across the now blood-red sky, an eerie crimson moon bathing the world in blood._

What was odd was how she even remembered the dream at all. Dreams that are as rich as cream while they unfold are skim milk when we wake, and in time they wash out of our minds, leaving as little residue as water filtered through cheesecloth.

But this dream was as vivid as any memory.

"_He's here." the woman said again, this time clutching a bloodied shoulder. When she raised her head, her face was marred with scratches and bruises. Blood blossomed on her white blouse as more and more wounds suddenly appeared on her body._

The sounds of water hitting tile passed through the bathroom and into the living room. Other noises, like the thumping of bare feet and a slam of a shower door were also heard. Rin realized just how frightened she was by how acute her hearing had become.

She didn't know why she was so afraid. In all honesty, Rin had survived scarier dreams. Well, at least, she knew she had survived scarier dreams, she just didn't remember them.

All she knew was that she didn't want to remember why this particular dream was more frightening than all the others.

The room was not completely dark, (with hints of grayish light seeping through a large window opposite the living room) the shadows creeping along the back wall reflected her mind's inner confusion and hesitancy.

Rin tried to divert her attention to other things, like how smooth the glass coffee table was, like how polished the kitchen counter behind the glass coffee table was, like how bright that vase of wildflowers on top of the kitchen counter behind the glass, like how—

…Like how that vase of wildflowers was not unlike that bouquet of wildflowers in her dream.

Damn that guy and his effeminate ways. It figures that out of all affluent men this side of Japan, Rin had to get stuck with the one who decorated his room with stupid flowers.

_A pool of blood started to spread from under the woman's ripped dress. _

She could tackle this situation two ways: One option would be to convince herself that 'it was only a dream,' so she would get over it. The other option would be to distract herself by annoying people, because that was what she did best.

Coming to a reasonable decision, Rin threw herself away from the couch and charged out of the living room before standing in front and banging on the bathroom door.

"Mr. GuyMan! I'm scared!"

The bathroom door did not answer back.

She tried again, her little fists pounding into the solid wood. "I know you're in there! Stop veing a stupid butt and come comfort me!"

Her only reply was the dutiful hammering of steady falling water.

Defeated, Rin slid to the floor and leaned her head against the bathroom. "Stupid prissy." she muttered. "Takes longer than a freakin' girl to wash his freakin' hair."

Maybe it was a bit unwise, to put so much confidence into a stranger for whom she had only known for the entirety of one day. And yet it was so easy to.

The water on the other side of the door dripped to a stop. Hopeful, Rin listened as a shower curtain rattled open…

…And a blow dryer started up. Rin's hopes were dashed.

She started banging her head against the door when, 20 minutes later, the blow dryer's howling had not yet ceased.

40 minutes (and a very bruised head) later, the noise _finally_ stopped.

There was a long silence.

"NOW WHAT?" Rin yelled. "GOTTA PUT ON YOUR MAKEUP FOR THE BIG DATE?"

Abruptly, the door was shoved open, revealing a glowering, albeit sparkly clean, suited businessman. Rin squeaked when the door unmercifully collided with her back, thrusting her unto the ground.

"What are you still doing here?" Sesshomaru snapped.

Rin wrinkled her nose in confusion. "What, did you expect me to run away or something? You're the one that—"

"No," Sesshomaru clarified. "I meant: 'why have you been standing outside my bathroom door for the past hour?'" then, thinking better of it, "Never mind. I don't want to know."

He twirled on a leather heel and left the girl on the floor.

"Wait!" she angrily shot up and ran after him into the kitchen. "You mean you heard me this entire time?" Processing what this meant, she realized, "You IGNORED me this entire time!"

The grunt from behind the refrigerator was all she needed to confirm her suspicions.

"There I was, scared out of my mind, and you didn't even care! I was _this close_ to crying!" deciding to pull the guilt card, she added, "If you had the teeniest ounce of sympathy, you would at least acknowledge my terrible suffering!"

Too bad Rin was dealing with a guy who had well-developed his Guilt Immune System. Sesshomaru pulled out a carton of milk and sniffed it. He wrinkled his nose and tossed the expired beverage into the trashcan, continuing his search for edible breakfast materials.

Rin fumed.

With little weaponry at her disposal, unconventional means were deemed necessary. That was why she started to crawl on top of the kitchen counter and reach for the cupboard, in an attempt to find something sticky, messy and colorful to pour unto the floor.

Unfortunately for her, not only did Sesshomaru have Guilt Immune System, but excellent Danger Radar. Just as Rin's small hands grasped a bottle of Slurpshey's Chocolate Syrup, he had grabbed hold of her ankles. Within seconds, Rin found herself upside down, her head suspended a couple feet above the kitchen tile.

"Dammit."

But Rin was a "lemonade out of lemons" kind of girl; after realizing she could not squirm out from Sesshomaru's vice-like grip, she took quick note of the fact that she still held possession of her syrupy ammunition. A well-aimed nozzle and a quick pop of the top…

"MY SHOES!"

Rin's giggle bordered on maniacal laughter.


End file.
